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Wedding Engagement:
The word Engagement is heard
in almost every walk of an individual’s life.
The dictionary meaning of engagement refers to, "the
act of engaging or the state of being engaged".
An engagement
is a promise to marriage, and
also the period of time between proposal and marriage,
which may be lengthy or trivial. During this period,
a couple is said to be affia-nced, betrothed, engaged
to be married, or engaged.
While most parents in Pakistan
seem to be plotting their child's wedding the moment
it is conceived, the planning starts in earnest with
the magni, or engagement. Mangis are arrived at in
a variety of manners - the more traditional method
entailing the boy and his parents going over to the
girl's house to 'see' the girl. Usually, the girl
will serve tea or make some other kind of token appearance,
and then the boy and his family go home and decide
if they like the girl and her family. Family is of
the utmost importance here - it is generally assumed
that if the family is good then the son or daughter
is good too. In this traditional method, the boy's
father would then send the proposal to the girl's
father, and after consulting with his daughter the
girl's family either accepts or rejects. Of course,
in this age of globalization, kids who grew up watching
Friends are not going to go for such a thing, so the
process is changing. Dating has entered the fray in
Pakistan, but it is usually done on the sly &
the parents are not told until the couple is ready
for marriage. But, whatever the method, once the match
is made & both parties have accepted, the fun
begins and engagemnt rings are given to future bride
and groom and they wear them happily.
The magni itself is a very small
ceremony with all the close family present
to see the couple formally engaged. As with all ceremonies
in any Muslim country, a prayer is said to ensure
the smoothness of the process and the happiness of
the couple. Food is usually served afterwards, but
this is usually a pretty reserved affair. The shadi
date is set, usually a good 6 months or more out,
and it is during this period of engagement that couples
following the more traditional route, who at this
point hardly know each other, get to hang out and
begin their first attempts at a relationship.
To conclude, engagement is proves
to a blessing for all, at any given phase of
life. It gives a chance for an individual, to not
only explore themselves but also understand to what
they want from their spouse. This avoids clashes and
misunderstanding in the married life.
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